Gray hairs act differently than the other hairs on one's
head. It's probably because they're old and feel entitled to do whatever they
want, when they want and how they want. It's kind of like my diabetic grandma
who wanted a piece of cake. Everybody was all up in arms about grandma wanting
cake. "Don't you give her that! She's diabetic! Are you trying to kill
her?" By golly, she had made it to 90 and why should she be denied? She
wanted cake, and if I recall correctly, she managed to get it on her own without
the help of her loving, concerned family.
Anyway, I know there are products in this world that will
help a person control the wiliness of crazy acting gray hair, but I'm willing
to bet you'd actually have to spend some time with these products to ensure
their usefulness. I imagine it's more time than I spend making my normal acting
hairs lay down in a semi-proper fashion every morning. Anything extra would rip
a hole in the time/space continuum because I'd have to wake up earlier than I
already do. This is not acceptable. The extra moments it would require to make
me look less like Albert Einstein are moments I do not choose to waste in such
a manner. I'd rather waste them sleeping. Unfortunately, my obvious laziness
creates another problem entirely. My lack of motivation dictates that I am
daily destined to be approached by all sorts of people who feel the desperate
need to pluck said hairs from my head without prior permission and apparently
without remorse either. What kind of
world do I live in that people feel entitled to remove my own personal hair
from my head, and in such a violent, painful manner? These people are
my friends, my coworkers and my family and they all act like its normal
behavior. They would argue that it is just uncontrollable, natural instinct to
want to grab something so obviously out of place and make it right. Well, my
natural instinct is to punch you right in the face after you rip out my hair,
but I seem to be able to control THAT.
Rogues.
All I can say is that Albert must have had no
friends. He certainly would have been bald.
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